Every behavior meets a need (secondary gain)

At first, it seems odd that a fear would have benefits; however, there’s always an emotional or subconscious value, or the behaviour wouldn’t continue.

Phobias may fulfil a need to feel safe, or they may become ingrained as part of one’s identity, even if rooted in outdated beliefs. An example from the book is a nightclub bouncer who found that his aggressive stance kept him safe at work but became problematic in daily life. Similarly, your phobia may meet a need that is no longer relevant.

Techniques like ideomotor signals can help identify secondary gains. Our unconscious mind often reveals deeper patterns and beliefs.

Arguing for your problem

Just like the characters in the “Four Yorkshiremen” sketch exaggerated their hardships, our minds may cling to phobias because of subconscious benefits like attention, sympathy, or identity.